Beary Grateful

“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” -Meister Eckhart

It’s thanksgiving morning and I woke up in the woods… Today I’m thankful for plaid dog beds next to a cozy fire place and turkey, yes i eat turkey for every meal of everyday for most of my life now. When is the lady going to stop feeding me thanksgiving dinner? It’s been quite the year. I was re-diagnosed with cancer in April. In May I did a 14 mile backpacking trip to Catalina island. In July, I did a 26 day road trip with my bro man Lassen, mom ,and dad to Wyoming, Montana, and Idaho, including glacier national park. I also  drove around in a van in Washington state and rode in a sea plane over the san Juan islands in August. I had my second cancer surgery last month in October, buying me more time to hopefully seal hunt.  My mom decided to get my surgery even though some closest to her didn’t agree. The voice of fear was so strong she almost pulled the plug on the surgery due to the risk. A friend of moms said to her , “whatever you do in love could not be wrong.”  I’m so glad she’s a dogged determined women who loves me! it turns out the “little” slow growing thyroid tumor was wrapped around my jugular vein and carotid artery. The highly skilled surgeon my mom almost didn’t go with  had the skill set to remove the tumor and keep me from paralysis in my throat. The other surgeon said if he found anything like that he would just close me back up on the operating table. the thankfulness for Dr. Vinayak and for God’s guidance here fills my little heart each day. My mom has always dreamed of owning a little cabin. When dad presents to her about the possibility of buying a home where they actually live at the beach, besides mom saying they cant afford it, she says she wants her cozy vintage cabin in the woods. November 1st, that dream became a reality. With all the blood, sweat and tears my mom’s dream of me enjoying cabin life with her and dad became our reality.  My pawerents are now owners of a 1959 little cabin near the lake on a nice parcel of land where bears come every night to have dance parties and find the trash treasures. There is the lake down the street and she reassured me there are seals there. Every morning Lassen stands up on the couch looking through the window hunting all the chipmunks from the couch. I prefer laying by the fire dreaming of seal tacos. The first night we got the cabin, a bear broke into my parents van and drank most of their alcohol. The legend is that the  bear sat in mom’s chair and opened cans drinking away. Im going to find that bear one day  and although I’m not into beer, I’m sure Lassen will have a drink with him. Although, the bear did drink all my pawarents mai tai drinks, perhaps he and i can go seal hunting together at the lake. The bear is trying to introduce to this new exotic meat called salmon, but i told him of an exotic ocean fish called poke that dad feeds me quite often.

 i am grateful for seals, three dog bakery, adventures, my family, warm puffy Patagonia jackets. What fills your heart today? What are you thankful for, as much as i love seals?  My mom is thankful today for every morning we wake up together. It’s not even so much the big adventures and the cabin that she thinks upon first when she thinks about thankfulness….its every morning she wakes up with us and there is cuddles and Lassen wanting his ball to be thrown and myself barking for my food, and the 4 of us cuddling while mom and dad drink coffee on the couch…its all the laughs and enthusiasm for life we experience each morning…it’s being together…its mom’s daily prayer where she reminds me that ‘Jesus is our true Parent, guiding and leading us, that Heaven is also our home and we will all be there together one day, that we are loved by Creator more than we could know…we are accepted and loved as we are.”  She gets close to my ear and whispers theses prayers every morning before she gets out of bed. One of mom’s favorite authors brene brown talks about sometimes struggling with feeling guilty for what she has when so many people have  lost what they love . Brene Brown discusses that when we push away receiving what we truly have, it tends to make us a less empathetic people and  when we can live in deep gratitude for all that fills our hearts  and for what is around us then we will know what its like for someone to live without the people and things they have loved and lost.  In regards to those who have lost those they love or lost their homes or things, Brene Brown says, “When you are grateful for what you have, I know you understand the magnitude of what I have lost.” My mom rests each day in how much she loves me, lass, and dad….and  each time she hears of a instagram dog friend dying, someone’s husband or boyfriend passing, a child leaving this earth too early, someone’s home being burnt down, a mom dying of cancer…she remembers how much love has been lost Today, we choose not to conjure up gratitude, but to simply love what we already have….i will continue to love my mom, dad, Lassen and seals and of course three dog bakery fiercely.  In the words of our loving teacher, live into today, for tomorrow has enough troubles of its own. My mom is the type when things are going good, in the back of her head is a feeling of ’’when will the other shoe going to drop?” So today I’m remind her of these truths her heart seems to forget. The author of a dog cancer blog did a tribute about her auntie passing…she shared how her auntie would show up at her house and when she would open the front door and let her in, her aunt would  go straight to greet her dogs and ‘wag her tail’  as they wagged to see her. Her auntie would take her two hands and shake her hands in the air like doing jazz hands to wag back at them. Now when we go crazy waggin our tails in the morning or when she mom gets home and i greet her at the door and I’m so happy wagging my tail, she’ wags’ her hands in the air doing jazz hands back. Some might find this crazy, but this is my grateful mom showing gratitude back to me. So friends lets wag our tails today, or wag our jazz hands in the air. We have today, we are alive…you are here and I am here today…so lets love what we already love and be thankful for what we love. i will catch you later, I’m going to go hiking and seal hunting now! Happy Turkey Day! Woof Woof!

“We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives.”

-John F. Kennedy

“Its’ not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving.”

-W.T. Purkiser

2 thoughts on “Beary Grateful

  1. I just re-read this and it spoke to my heart, timing is indeed everything. Thank you for your bones of wisdom, Eben, and for continuing to make me smile at the antics of you and your beloved family, and for making me remember that which is truly important. ❤️❤️❤️


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